Boys and Tough Guise

     What does it mean to be a real man and what role does organized sports play in it?  In a video I watched called "Tough Guise" by Jackson Katz, a group of young teen boys said that to be a man you had to be tough, strong, a leader, independent, athletic and respected.  If you were not a man, you were labeled a wuss, girly, and a fag.  Men and boys put up a "front" or mask to hide our vulnerability.  Almost every male wants some kind of respect.  I know when I was growing up I wanted to be respected too and I wanted to fit in.
     Part of the video was about the school shootings and what it was that drove the suspects to go on a rampage and shoot.  Media plays a big part of our socialization, whether it be movies, television, and ads in the magazines.  Most of the violence that happens are caused by men.  There is violence againt women, but most of the violence is men against other men.  The violence reported in the news, newspapers, and other media don't question "Why is it that boys/men that are committing this?".  If women/girls do something bad, the media will automatically question "Why?".  Take for example the story of Lorena Bobbit who castrated her husband.  The media was asking why she did it.  Jackson said that violence has been gendered masculine.  He also said that it is often men in charge who are the creators and authors of pop culture.  Some of the men known to degrade and put down women are Andrew Dice Clay, Howard Stern, and Rush Limbaugh. 
     Sports has helped play a role in masculinity.  In the article I read titled "Boyhood, Organized Sports, and the Construction of Masculinities", the author Michael Messner interviewed thirty male former athletes.  Almost all of those interviewed played sports because they were influenced by their uncles, older brothers, or community.  Playing a sport came naturally to some, while others had to be "nudged" into playing.  There was a quote by Zane Grey who said, "All boys love baseball.  If they don't they're not real boys".  Most of the boys wanted approval from their fathers.  When I was a boy I played different kinds of sports like baseball, bowling, basketball, and tennis.  I loved playing sports.  My father played softball for his work team, bowling, and even golf.  I don't remember if I played to get recognition from my father but I'm sure it would feel good. 
     Good examples of who real men are are Mark Mcgwire, Mohammed Ali, and Christopher Reeve.  Mark Mcgwire is portrayed as a tough, real man.  He is tall, strong, and physically fit.  During a press conference, he talked about his foundation to help girls and boys who were sexually abused and he became emotional.  The reporters were surprised because he showed his vulnerability.  No one knew that a man of his status would cry.  To me, being a real man is being able to provide for your family, acknowledging that my wife and I are equals in our relationship and household, and showing respect to the elders and women.